HAPPY

Dear God, please hear me out I know it's been a couple years Since I've reached out and said hello I bet you're wondering why I keep Obsessing on and stressing all the little things When I should be living life and soaking up the memories I know I've been selfish, I have No excuse to give you, it's true Hanging by a thread's how I live I don't know why, but I feel more comfortable Living in my agony Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don't Care what anyone else thinks When I know truthfully that that's the furthest thing from how I Feel, but I'm too proud to open up and ask you To pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped in The truth is I need help, but I just can't imagine Who I'd be if I was happy Yeah, been this way so long It feels like something's off when I'm not depressed I got some issues that I won't address I got some baggage I ain't open yet I got some demons I should put to rest I got some traumas that I can't forget I got some phone calls I've been avoiding Some family members I don't really connect with Some things I said, I wish I woulda not let slip Some hurtful words that never shoulda left my lips Some bridges burned, I'm not ready to rebuild yet Some insecurities I haven't dealt with, yes I'll be the first to admit that I'm a lonely soul And the last to admit I need a hand to hold Losing hope, heading down a dangerous road Strange, I know, but I feel most at home when I'm Living in my agony Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don't Care what anyone else thinks When I know truthfully that that's the furthest thing from how I Feel, but I'm too proud to open up and ask you To pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped in The truth is I need help, but I just can't imagine Who I'd be if I was happy Don't know what's around the bend Don't know what my future is But I can't keep on living in Living in my agony Watching my self-esteem go up in flames, acting like I don't Care what anyone else thinks When I know truthfully that that's the furthest thing from how I Feel, but I'm too proud to open up and ask you To pick me up and pull me out this hole I'm trapped in The truth is I need help, but I just can't imagine Who I'd be if I was happy If I was happy If I was happy